Not a dumb question at all. It sounds to me like you just haven't gotten a good grasp on basic mixing strategy yet(but you will). automation is one method(and one of the 2 most important methods) for this process. The other is carving out space for the vocal so it sits well in the mix(not too loud and not too soft). That can be done with EQ(cut frequencies in music so they don't bury the vocal), panning(spread instruments out to the sides and keep the vocal centered), keep the vocal on the dry side(too much verb and/or delay will push it back into the mix), and ultimately, a combination of all 3 is what does best. What you describe as an automatic function is called ducking. That's where you run the music(or certain parts of it) thru a stereo group, insert a compressor with the side-chain enabled, and feed the side-chain from the vocal(each time the vocal hits the threshold, the music gets compressed downward). This can work great for voice over work(TV/radio commercials) but isn't quite as good with music.
Another tool you may try is to compress the vocal(but not too much) which will bring up the softer parts and attenuate the louder parts. A 3rd routine I do is to open up the AudioSuite GAIN plugin, go thru the vocal track and find all the weak parts, highlight them(1 at a time) and AudioSuite process then with maybe 3db of gain(that will make that region louder, and show slightly larger on the screen). The trick is to choose a boost amount that makes it all sound natural and smooth, not so parts jump out. Practice and experiment, and you'll find what works for you
