PETITION: Make me a ham sandwich-

[D.Don]

Do you sell root beer?

/don

[Barnabas]

Have you tried the new PorkPromoter plugin? It takes a cheap ham and makes it sound like one of those fancy studio hams. I recently ran a Spam and Velveeta sandwich through the PorkPromoter plugin, and my client thought I was using an expensive deli-style ham like Neumham, Sennhamser or Beyerdynhamic.

[DJ Insomaniac]

Have you tried the new PorkPromoter plugin? It takes a cheap ham and makes it sound like one of those fancy studio hams. I recently ran a Spam and Velveeta sandwich through the PorkPromoter plugin, and my client thought I was using an expensive deli-style ham like Neumham, Sennhamser or Beyerdynhamic.

No way! Wow, Spam and Velveeta, how much was that thing? It doesn't require the "Mustard-Spreading Stick", right?

Don, are you sure that the botle of root beer is compatible with the new ham sandwich? I've heard some pretty grizzly stories, check out RootBEER 3.0, it'll be worth it!

[Soliton]

Call me old fashioned, but I still use my vintage outboard toaster to give it some warmth.

[dubaifox]

Call me old fashioned, but I still use my vintage outboard toaster to give it some warmth.

Ba Da Boom!!!

[RussUK]

Ba Da Boom!!!

You should get a toasted sandwich maker and then you will get a perfect stereo image!

[edgarbc1]

Call me old fashioned, but I still use my vintage outboard toaster to give it some warmth.

(best response so far!)

a close second....

I don't care as long as I get Deli-Compensation.

[kraster]

Have you tried the new PorkPromoter plugin? It takes a cheap ham and makes it sound like one of those fancy studio hams. I recently ran a Spam and Velveeta sandwich through the PorkPromoter plugin, and my client thought I was using an expensive deli-style ham like Neumham, Sennhamser or Beyerdynhamic.

You gotta try the URS ParmaDynamics and the ParmaQ. Just like the real thing.

[RussUK]

Is it me or is this post getting a bit cheesy?

I am sure you 'relish' the idea of this post making a difference, but does that mean you have to resort to 'sub'versive means. 'Lettuce' make our own minds up about what we want. You have 'mustard' up some support but using this place to have a 'beef' about it is perhaps not what Digi intends.

Anyway while we are making suggestions I'm going to 'steak' my claim and say any chance of a built in 'tuna'?

[Phil Jeffers]

Man walks into a grocer’s store:
Man: Hi there do you sell fruit?
Store owner: Yes what would you like?
Man: I'm not sure, can I try some?
Owner: Of course, help yourself.
Man: Mmmm nice apple, nice orange, nice banana... I think I'll take the apple.
2 days later
Man: Hey I was in here the other day and bought this apple.
Owner: is there a problem?
Man: Yes it tastes like an apple
Owner: That's because it is an apple
Man: But I want it to taste like an orange and look like a banana.
Owner: Well it won't, it's an apple!
Man: Well the orange taste like and orange...
Owner: That's because it is an orange!
Man: But why can't the apple taste like an orange?
Owner: Errr because it's an apple.
Man: But that's not what I want!
Owner: I'll tell you what I'm a reasonable man, why don't I give you your money back and you can buy something else that more suits you?
Man: I'll tell you what that's not the answer I want, in fact I'm sure you won't make this apple taste like an orange cause if you did then I wouldn't need to buy your lettuce!
Owner thinks for a moment... 'which is easier, blowing my brains out or his?'
Man: You've not heard the last of this, I'm going to come back with all the other apple owners you've cheated!