Musician jokes.

[mlemos]

Hi,

When things are slow at work I NEED the DUC to entertain me and get me through the day.
Since today has been such a slow posting day here I thought I would try to entertain myself so here are some musician jokes that I found.

Feel free to post more if you know any.

What do you say to a banjo player in a three-piece suit?
"Will the defendant please rise?"

How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?
Twelve. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it better.

What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?
He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it.

How many bass players does it take to change a lightbulb?
One, but the guitarist has to show him how first.

Did you hear about the bass player who was so bad that even the lead singer noticed?

What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?
Saliva.

Sorry to subject you to these cheesy jokes,
Marc

[electrobank]

I got a couple for ya:

How do you know when there is a drummer at your door?
The knocks keep speeding up and he doesn't come in on time.

How do drummers make their car more aerodynamic?
They take off the Domino's Pizza delivery sign.

What do you get a drummer for his birthday?
A guitar.

[img]images/icons/cool.gif[/img]

Nothin' against drummers. Really folks.

[Kev]

Why do drummers leave drumsticks on the dash board of the car?
So they can park in disabled parking spots.

How do you know the drum stool is level?
The drummer dribbles from BOTH sides of the mouth.

[pk_hat]

How many DJ/remixers does it take to change a light bulb?

2, one to change the bulb, the other to analyze how much better the original was.

pk

[mlemos]

Here's a good M$ joke:

How many Microsoft engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they just define darkness as an industry standard!

[Roy Howell]

HA! [img]images/icons/grin.gif[/img]

[badperson]

How do you make a guitarist turn down?
Put a sheet of music in front of him.

How do you know when a singer's at the door?
Because she can't find the key and doesn't know when to come in.

What's the definition of an optimist?
A trombone player with a beeper.

What do you call someone who likes to hang around musicians?
A drummer.

How do you get a violist to play a tremolo?
On the score, write a whole note with "solo" written above it.

[murph16]

What's the difference between a harmonica player and a dead skunk in the middle of the road?

The skunk was on his way to a gig!
[img]images/icons/cool.gif[/img]

[Aussie169]

What do you get when you cross a bass player with a roadie?

An even dumber roadie!

[Emo King]

What do you get when you come across more than 12 lame jokes in the DUC...
[img]images/icons/tongue.gif[/img]